Tuesday 11 May 2021
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12 Ways To Deal With A Cheating Spouse

Maybe you’ve walked in on them in a compromising position? Perhaps you’ve seen secrets texts hidden on their phone? Or maybe you’ve found a present that’s not meant for you? However you found out about your spouse’s affair, you’re most probably devastated.

It can be hard to know what to do after finding out about that your partner is cheating on you. That’s why we’ve put together this guide to 12 ways to deal with a cheating spouse.


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  1. Get proof. The first thing that you need to do is get evidence that they’ve been cheating. Obviously, if you’ve walked in on them, you’ve already got your proof. However, if you haven’t actually seen the cheating, you need to find a way to get proof.
  1. Tell them you know. Once you know that they’ve been cheating, it’s important to tell them that you know. Don’t attempt to keep it quiet as this will only make things worse. Tell your partner that you know and see what they have to say for themselves.
  1. Decide what to do. This is the hardest part of finding out that your partner has been cheating on you – deciding what you should do. This depends on whether they’ve been having a full blown affair or whether it was just a one-off mistake.
  1. Get your own back. Okay, so this might not be productive for forming a healthy relationship, but after he’s cheated on you, you deserve to get your own back. Maybe it’s not wise to start an affair, but there’s nothing wrong with having a little fun. Visit and spend some time flirting and chatting with singles, you might even have fun.
  1. Try to work past it. If his cheating was a one-off mistake, it might be worth trying to work past it. If he was drunk and made a bad choice and is truly sorry, think about working past it together. Moving on from infidelity isn’t easy, but it is doable.


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  1. Get support. Whatever you and your partner have decided to do, you need to get some support. Having your spouse cheat on you can wreak havoc on your confidence and leave you with trust issues for life. That’s why it’s a good idea to get some help from a counsellor or support group.
  1. Spend some time together. If you’re unsure whether you want to be with your partner, spend some time together. Go for a break away and spend some one-on-one time together, to see if the spark is still there.
  1. Try to fix things. If there’s still something between you, it could be worth trying to fix things. This means talking through what happened and how you can ensure it never happens again.
  1. If it can’t be fixed, decide what to do. If you realize that your relationship is past mending, it’s time to think about your next steps. This might be scary, especially if you have kids, but you deserve to be happy.
  1. Hire a lawyer. Before doing anything, get legal advice. This is important as in retaliation to you wanting to break up with them; your partner may react badly.
  2. File for divorce. Once you’ve got a lawyer and know what you want, the next step is to file for divorce. It’s important not to rush this decision, as it’s a big deal and something that needs to be well thought through.
  1. Move on. The most important thing after a divorce is to move on. It might take time, but you need to take the steps to get on with your life.

To make dealing with a cheating spouse easier, stick to these tips.